Finding My Style And Myself Again
I posted this outfit to my Instagram stories over the weekend and it seemed to resonate with a lot of you. And I think it might have been less about the outfit and more about my goal for the outfit. I was headed to my first group gathering/party in 2+ years. I wanted to look put together but also feel comfortable. A feel good outfit that was also no fuss. I live in Vermont too. Heels aren’t really a thing (honestly I’m fine with it!). The converse were a bit of a miss, we are approaching mud season and I had to tiptoe through the parking lot at the brewery. Otherwise I think I nailed it.
Lately I’ve found myself sort of fumbling back towards my personal style.
Through motherhood and then pandemic, I lost my way a bit. I find myself staring into my closet and then trying on 15 different things and not loving any of it. I still have a lot of pieces in my wardrobe from pre-baby that don’t fit me anymore. They’re not going to fit me again. But I can’t seem to let go of them. I don’t really know why. I’ve just been, uninspired.
Maybe there’s still a little part of me that’s clinging on to who I was pre-baby. The little pang of nostalgia for that old life and those old clothes that no longer serve me. It feels weird to say that because I don’t want that old life back, but sometimes I miss it too. I get the feeling there’s an expectation that once our child reaches a certain age we should be “over it.” Like you can only mourn your old life when your baby is still a baby.
This weekend at the party, the first one I’ve been to in SO long, I felt myself coming back. That old me, pre-baby me, she’s been a little bit buried from the last two years of operating in survival mode. For those few hours, I was just there. Deep in conversation with other women. Undistracted. Laughing. Listening. Absorbing.
The next day I started cleaning out my closet. Slowly but surely, I’m finding my style and myself again.
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